The Navy Chief noticed a new seaman and barked at him "get over here! Whats your name sailor?
"John," the seaman replied.
"Look, I don't know what kind of bleeding-heart pansy crap they're teaching sailors in boot camp these days, but I don't call anyone by his first name"
The Chief scowled. "It breeds familiarity, and that leads to a breakdown in authority.
"I refer to my sailors by their last names only, Smith, Jones, Baker, whatever. And you are to refer to me as Chief. Do I make myself clear?"
"Aye Aye Chief"
"Now that we got that stright, What's your last Name?"
The seaman sighed. "Darling, My name is John Darling, Chief"
"Okay, John, Here's what I want you to do..."